HP has gone all Christmas-spirited on us and wants to pay cold hard cash in order to keep young tearaways off the streets.

So if you can bear to dig out a couple of pics of your aunt Polly gurning beside the Christmas tree, please send them to www.hp.com/uk/festivecard. At least it'll all be in a good cause.

Press release

There are thousands of poor, underprivileged children running around the country stealing hub-caps, committing acts of general larceny and collecting ASBO orders. You can help stop this.

All we need is for you to donate your xmas type pictures and messages to www.hp.com/uk/festivecard

For every photo I can get, I'll give the NCH £1 of HP's money. We're hoping to make it a five figure sum, so need quite a few.

Go on. If these kids stay on the streets, they'll probably spend their time breaking in to your flat or keying your car. And you wouldn't want that.