Technology has rewired our brains, altered our expectations, and, frankly, turned us all crazy. How do you know if this has happened to you? Look for the following 21 warning signs.
Life is tough
7. Your idea of roughing it is spending a week without Sky+. Those things that keep interrupting the program you're watching? They're called 'adverts'. Annoying, yes, but usually not fatal.
8. Your flight's on-board Wi-Fi dies, and you're thinking about parachuting down to the nearest Starbucks so that you can log on. Still, that's better than watching Twilight: Eclipse, the in-flight movie.
9. YouTube just cannot stream videos of cats singing opera fast enough for your tastes. We understand that adopting a Highlander accent and shouting "She canna go na faster cap'n!" helps. If Scotty can't fix it, nobody can.
10. Somebody cuts you off in traffic, and you immediately search your steering wheel for the 'Thumbs-Down' button. The good news: Even when you're short on thumbs, you still have two middle fingers.
11. You log on to music streaming sites and find playlists you don't remember creating. The Lady Gaga/Madonna station makes some sense, we suppose, but that Disney/Slayer mashup?
12. You're seriously considering buying a new Ford Fiesta with Sync just so you can have your tweets read to you while you're driving. Not to worry - we understand that the folks at Twitter are working on a brain implant. Soon, what's on Ashton Kutcher's tiny little mind may also be on yours.
13. You have to find a bigger house because your HDTV needs more space. Also, it's really had enough of your snoring and is demanding separate bedrooms.
Oh my, Wi-Fi
14. Your long-time neighbours tell you they're moving, and you're really upset because now you'll need to find another open Wi-Fi connection to 'borrow'. That, and they usually kept the curtains open at night.
15. You always keep the lawn neatly manicured and the front of your house spotless, just in case the Google Street View camera van passes by. We're sure they appreciate the thought.
16. Your 6Mp digital camera isn't 'high-res' enough for you anymore. Hey, if you can't take bathroom-mirror self-portraits and blow them up to wall size, what good is it?
17. You keep clutching your Apple iPad and waiting for something magical, revolutionary, and life-changing to happen. If that doesn't occur, don't blame Apple; you were probably just holding it wrong.
18. You keep telling everyone that you bought an Android phone because you couldn't abide signing a two-year contract with a mobile network, when the real reason is that the Android Market doesn't ban adult apps. Don't fret, we won't tell anybody about your collection of naughty Popeye and Olive Oyl pics.
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