My wife and I put our elder daughter .....

  Clapton is God 11:44 10 Apr 11
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.... on a plane at Gatwick yesterday as she flew off to start a new teaching job in Athens.

There were quite a few tears (and that was just Dad) as we waved her goodbye.

It was bloody painful for Mrs Clapton is God and me.

Have any other members experienced this sort of pain?

  spider9 11:52 10 Apr 11
Answer

"Have any other members experienced this sort of pain?"

Only everyone who has had kids, I suspect.

  Forum Editor 12:29 10 Apr 11

I experienced similar feelings when I saw my eldest daughter off at Heathrow when she went to work in America. She was only there for six months, but it seemed like six years.

Thank goodness for the internet and video conferencing.

The pain fades. She'll be fine, and you'll be fine.

  rickf 12:43 10 Apr 11

When my son went to uni to live independently for the first he had tears in his eyes when we were leaving. This of course caused a chain reaction. I still remember the feelings from almost 3 yrs ago. He is very different now and extremely independent. In fact it's quite difficult to get him to spend time at the family home nowadays.

  Forum Editor 13:03 10 Apr 11

she didn't want to know too much about where and how we lived.

I think that's the thing. When your child is abroad for any length of time you start imagining what he/she is doing, where, and with whom. It takes an effort of will not to keep asking, and an even greater one to stop imagining.

In the end they're fine, of course, and you realise that you've raised an independently minded adult. I can remember that moment of revelation, after which I relaxed considerably. My girls subsequently went off to Thailand together, and I didn't worry at all - at least, that's what I told myself. They had a whale of a time, and that brings me neatly back to fourm member's mother's attitude.

  morddwyd 20:36 10 Apr 11

There were no tears when our son left for Oz until I said, "Well the next time we see you you'll have come home to bury one of us!".

MY son and I laughed but the womenfolk took it a bit amiss.

There are different ways of tackling demons.

  flycatcher1 22:30 10 Apr 11

Our eldest Grandson has been given (taken) a three month sabbatical. Started with the Paris Marathon today, solo three weeks in Japan from tomorrow, then month rail travel in Europe, then cycle Lands End - John o'Groats then three weeks cycling trip to Peru (with Father).

Tears in my eyes ? Too right - why didn't I do that.

Looking at the above he is going to end up with sore feet a sore behind and the chance of radiation sickness.

  Forum Editor 22:43 10 Apr 11

flycatcher1

It sounds to me as though he's going to have a great time.

  carver 08:39 11 Apr 11

I think it's called being a parent, when my daughter started at UNI and we took her down to stay there I felt as if I had abandoned her.

It was only a 90 minute drive away but for the first time in 17 years we came home to an empty bedroom with no daughter in it, it's a very strange feeling to have.

Then she went and spoilt it by learning to drive and buying a car, we had her back every weekend after that with her dirty washing and a list of all the food she needed for the following week.

  ella33 09:42 11 Apr 11

Yes I think there are times when Uni can seem as far away as Athens! I do feel for the wrench and worry, Clapton is god but is it possible to share in the excitement of Athens with your daughter? Find out about the area and see if you can get a holiday there somewhere and visit her while you are there? I know she needs her independence for her job and feel sure that you respect that but she might enjoy sharing the experience with you? Just a thought.

  flycatcher1 09:49 11 Apr 11

FE Yes, he will have a great time. He felt that if he did not do those things before he was thirty he never would. My two daughters went to uni in London. As soon as they left we changed the locks on the doors and neither of them has lived at home since. Has this saved me money ? No!

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