Alternative English Dictionary.

  gengiscant 15:45 22 Jun 08

Referendum:A rhetorical question to which there is only one allowable answer.

Ecolyte.A follower of fatuous green fashions."james and Arabella have installed a wind turbine on the roof,which will generate enough electricity to boil a kettle by the year 2158.

  jakimo 15:53 22 Jun 08

It would be quicker going down to the local cafe for a cup of tea

  mrwoowoo 15:57 22 Jun 08

I have a green T-shirt and socks.Does that make me an Ecolyte?

  Fruit Bat /\0/\ 16:01 22 Jun 08

All the people that have fitted wind turbines around here are in need of roof repairs, as the gales are fetching them down.

Seen 3 this morning leaning at odd angles.

  Pineman100 17:46 22 Jun 08

Mobster: An aggressive crustacean.

Gurgle: To steal a ventriloquist's dummy.

Acupuncture: A jab well done.

Plateau: A high form of flattery.

Will: A dead giveaway.

Coincidental: Having matching teeth.

Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

Minimal: A very small shopping centre.

Titillate: Delayed puberty.

Condom: Device for use on every conceivable occasion.

  mrwoowoo 19:19 22 Jun 08

Very good.
Here's some more.
HARDWARE: The part of the computer which you kick when the software malfunctions.

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only creatures you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.


INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.

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