To deal first with the TV /dvd recorder.
The aerial lead (co ax) from the main aerial should fist go to the aerial in of the DVD recorder.Then connect with co ax from the DVD recorder Out to the TV in. In this way, the tuner in the DVD recorder and the TV have their own input signal and you can watch one and record on the other. Then connect the DVD recorder to the TV with either (if they have the sockets) an HDMI lead or a SCART if not. Then, whilst watching TV with that remote,fine and the guide for the TV should come up when you press guide. With the DVD recorder on and using its remote, when you press the guide, the DVD recorders guide comes up and you can set the recording. Also if you play a stored programme the tv should auto switch to input from the recorder, or you may have to select the relvant AV channel on the TV.You can, theoretically, record from the tv but I would not bother. Re the stereo I will ask others to comment.